Useful Ways of Looking

Useful Ways of Looking is a series on concepts I often reference. You could think of them as mental models, or primitives, or keys, or, well, Ways of Looking. You probably landed here because I referenced one and sent you this link for further explanation!

The Useful Ways of Looking are not necessarily true, but they are — as the name suggests — often useful. Finding where to skillfully apply them is part of the job.

In brief

Any journey of change — improving a skill, building a company, spiritual evolution — can be thought of as moving through a series of locked doors (lessons), for each of which you must find the key. But the doors are in a different order for everyone, which means the “key sequence” that served one person may not match yours. With that, consider that the key you currently need could come from anywhere, but probably not from the place others tell you it will.

More context

In Spiritual Enlightenment: The Damnedest Thing, the pseudonymous author and protagonist Jed McKenna covers this idea in one of his lectures (and again in a later conversation with Mary about the “gateless gate”):

“You’ve all heard the saying ‘When the student is ready, the teacher appears.’ Well, that means a lot more than just the mysterious arrival of gurus in a timely manner. It means that the knowledge you need will appear when you’re ready for it. The ability to open the next door is never denied, but the ability to open the door after the next is never granted. In this sense, you’ll have many, many teachers.

In this sense, a passage from the Bible might be exactly the right thing at exactly the right time, but that doesn’t mean the entire Bible is the right thing all the time. Even the books and teachings I like the most I consider ninety percent useless.”

I look around at the faces and see a spectrum of comprehension ranging from near empty to near full. That’s to be expected.

“It’s all about unlocking the next door,” I continue, “and having ten thousand keys doesn’t mean a thing if none of them opens the door you’re standing in front of.

‘Teacher’ is just a word for the key you need to open the next door. After you’re enlightened, you can revisit these great books and the great teachings to your heart’s content and then they’ll no longer be mysterious or impenetrable to you, but they’ll still be of no use to you because you’ll already be enlightened, so it would really only be a recreational pursuit.”

I would clarify: if you’ve just opened the metaphorical “door 17,” not only might the same “teacher” or “mentor” or “source” not always open “door 18” — but it may be that your friend’s “door 18” is a totally different door than yours.

In fact, their “door 18” might have been your “door 1” — or it might be your “door 1046.”

This is why, when you truly learn a lesson, sometimes you get a bolt of deja vu to someone having told you that very thing years ago, or a book you read that “taught” you the same (even though you didn’t internalize it). You got handed the key back then, but it wasn’t the one you needed for your then-current door. So you dropped it — only to need it years later.

These differing sequences can lead to feelings of inadequacy: “why do they seem to be able to handle situations like this so well?” But of course, whoever “they” is may think the same of you in a different situation. One of their earlier doors and keys is one of your later ones that you haven’t yet reached; and vice versa.

A strategy I recommend to deal with this: read and consume widely and with an open mind. I have found this to be the most effective path to progression.

Certainly some people have their bible — for many, literally The Bible — and find all the answers they need there, through deep reading and re-reading.

But I have found that through ambient rumination, keys I have stumbled across in the past often resurface when I need them. So I tend to get more mileage out of consuming new ideas or sources, increasing my chance of finding the key I happen to need at the moment.

So, with this “doors and keys” way of looking: when you are facing a challenge, recognize that it is simply your next door, and that “the ability to open the next door is never denied, but the ability to open the door after the next is never granted.” You just need to rummage around for the key.

And most of all, when someone tries to give you a path that worked for them and sounds easy — recognize that it may have been their path; their sequence of doors. And for them, having been through the sequence already, it will “no longer be mysterious or impenetrable.” It’ll sound simple

But for better or worse, yours will be different, and you’ll need to find your own way. Don’t get frustrated when theirs doesn’t work perfectly for you — take what you need, seek out other teachers and keys, and just keep moving.

Further readings

Jed McKenna’s Spiritual Enlightenment: The Damnedest Thing.

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